Chapter 2: Paralysis
2407
Lights. Flashing, moving.
On. Off. On. Off. On. Off.
Noise.
Constant, droning, thunderous noise.
Barely audible, a periodic sharp ‘beep’ sound. It repeats.
Again and again, every few seconds.
Always there.
Cold.
Metal.
I’m laying on something.
I can feel everything.
The imperfections in the metal against the palms of my hands.
The fabric band around my head.
The lack of physical restraints.
The small rectangular device attached to my chest.
I can’t move.
The device that beeps when I breathe. No. I breathe when it beeps.
Beep. In … Out.
I can feel the wind against my face.
No. No, no no, wait. I remember.
I’m on a ship. It’s not wind, can’t be wind.
Motion.
I’m moving.
Quickly.
Downwards.
I’m falling?
Beep. In … Out.
I get more clarity as the motion slows.
I’m not falling, I’m horizontal.
The lights aren’t flashing, they’re moving past me, above me.
In and out of my field of view.
The sound, the hum of an anti-gravity device keeping me afloat.
I’m on a stretcher.
Beep. In … Out.
I can’t turn my head.
I can’t lift my arms.
I can’t move anything at all.
I can’t blink.
I can’t breathe - except at the beep.
The ceiling lights have turned.
I’ve turned.
Moving into a room.
Beep. In … Out.
It’s so bright. I can’t see a light source, but the ceiling is all white.
Cold. Colder than the metal I’m laying on.
I can’t shiver.
Clanking metal.
Movement all around.
Other people!
But I can’t talk. I can’t move. I can’t ask for help.
Beep. In … Out.
Finally a glimpse!
There’s another Romulan! At least I’m still among my own people.
She’s standing over me in some sort of… it’s a surgical outfit.
A doctor. Was I injured?
Can she help me?
Beep. In … Out.
There’s noise.
There’s pain.
My arm! Sudden and unbearable pain.
I’m trying to scream. I can’t scream.
There’s more noise around me. A strange low droning. Drilling.
Beep. In … Out.
I can no longer feel the cold of the table under my arm.
Instead, I feel a different sort of cold metal just below my shoulder.
Jagged, uneven. All around, like a sleeve.
A strange sensation, beyond the pain.
My cheek is wet.
A small droplet, running down my face, pooling at my ear.
Beep. In … Out.
“I’m sorry, Tafv, I know it hurts, but we’re almost done.”
The voice is close.
Soft.
Comforting.
Kind.
It must have been the doctor.
“You forget yourself, Subcommander!”
A louder voice.
Decidedly male, barking in reprimand.
"You are not in Rihan, and this is not a hospital!
It’s not?
Beep. In … Out.
“It is specimen number two six four, and it is already dead. Stop wasting time.”
Are they talking about me?
I’m not dead!
I’M NOT DEAD!
“Major, he’s not-”
Yes! Tell him!
“IT is already dead. Do not make me regret your assignment here. Alert me when your work is complete.”
Beep. In … Out.
There’s more noise.
Footsteps.
A door.
Open.
Slam, closed.
“Fehill’curak… I’m sorry, Tafv.”
I can hear the exhaustion in her voice.
I can feel it too.
I still can’t move.
It’s getting harder to try.
It’s getting harder to think.
Beep. In … Out.
My shoulder is moving!
But I’m not moving it.
There’s still pain, but it’s dulled.
I feel nothing below my bicep.
“Stage One Complete. Grafting… unsuccessful. Nerve damage indicates that subject will not retain control of the prosthetic without nanoprobes. Proceeding to Stage Two.”
Beep. In … Out.
She’s standing over me now.
I can see her clearly.
For one brief moment we make eye contact.
It gives her pause, but only temporarily.
She begins her work.
There’s more pain.
Suddenly it’s dark.
Beep. In … Out.
Time has passed.
I don’t know how much, but I can see it in her.
Her face is sullen, her eyes are dim.
Her once pristine white garment now notably stained green with blood.
My blood.
“Stage Eight Complete. Grafting continues to be unsuccessful. Cardiothoracic structures unable to support implantation without major modification. Maybe… maybe we’ll have better luck with two six five. End Report.”
Beep. In … Out.
“Bedah, Tafv,” she says quietly as she finishes her recording, “Bed aoi.”
I hear the sound of the door.
Open.
Close.
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.