The pain is exquisite and complete. It cuts to his very core, something beyond the flesh, beneath and beyond and infinitely more vulnerable. It lays his mind bare to the grabbing, squeezing, rending fingers, too many to count, probing from all sides. Wildly thrashing at the depths of his consciousness from-
-the top of the plateau Ecurai seemed to go on forever. Modest green spires almost match it's height, tenements built to house the bustling city. A great pit behind Davin bustled with the sound of workmen, turning the grassy plateau into the colony's first, and certainly most scenic, amphitheater. Siras said it would be done by the end of summer, which was a shame because the view of Ecurai blossoming in the early spring was breathtaking. Of course, Davin wasn't supposed to be up here anyway, but-
"Hey! Hey, kid!" A voice called from behind him, and Davin cursed. "You shouldn't be-"
"-retaining this much control," the operator says, giving Davin something to focus on. Something other than the pain. He can see the Tal Shiar at the control panel across the room. His face, hazy but present. Closer he sees D'Kera. She is wearing some kind of headband, and looking intently into Davins eyes. Closer still he sees his shirt, grey stained with a streak of green. He feels wet warmth running down his face. 'My nose is bleeding', says a voice in his head. A distant, in distinct whisper.
"Compensating," the Tal Shiar says. "Boosting power to-"
"-forward shield arrays!" Lir looked back at Davin as he wrestled with Celeris' control yolk. "I'll keep us clear of those cannons!"
"Aye, Sir!" Lir made the adjustments, and Davin sent Celeris into a dive. The Federation Starbase rose out of view, along with the mix of Klingon and Federation ships. One was so close he could see the symbols painted across its broad saucer section. 'U.S.S. October' the glyphs read, whatever that meant.
Another volley of disruptor fire rocked the ailing warbird, and Davin cursed aloud. "Ready all weapons! I'll bring us back around, and we're going to give them everything we've got!"
"At your command, Riov!" Kaeni grinned, painting targets for The Big Guns. "Let's give 'em what they want!"
Davin smirked, and turned a limping Celeris on the Klingon raiders. "Federation battlegroup, this is the Warbird Celeris, we're going in for another pass."
"Confirmed Celeris, this is Argo control," came the reply over the crowded comms connection. "We'll give you what cover we can from the Starbase."
Davin punched the throttle. Full impulse, cannons charged, he gave them everything-
-hurts. The whole of him consumed by an ache that radiates from his very core, his very essence, as it is flipped through like a picturebook. And another ache, one of bio neural leads around his head, a band like D'Keras, heavy and very much active. He can smell blood, the metallic tang of it running down his throat. 'I'm not going to survive this,' he thinks with absolute certainty.
"You will, my darling," D'Kera says softly. Davin tries to muster some modicum of surprise, but everything hurts. "I just need to know what you know. I need to look around a bit, go through your mind and see if you know anything useful." Her grin grows. "And I know you do, Davin. You're a Mandukar after all, aren't you?"
The pain consumes the anger. The pain consumes the revulsion, the indignation, the shock. She is in there, grasping, feeling. Fingers, so many jagged, reaching fingers. He focuses on one, on the pain of one, as if he could grab it, and-
-suddenly he was on the screen, this awestruck little whelp who had dared to defy the Tal Shiar. But it was-
"Davin," he heard himself say. He heard it, knew the words, and knew they were his words. And yet they weren't. So long ago, above the Ecurai colony, D'Kera Mandukar had spoken those words. And now Davin was in her place, playing her role. In her memory. "Davin, it's-"
"Mom..." From this perspective, seeing himself in this moment... it was surreal. There he was, eight years younger. Before Argo, before the Republic. Before...
"All elements, cease fire!" He called in his D'Kera voice. "Cease fire, fvadt you all! Lower our shields, and stand by transporters!"
"The colony... How could you..." Davin saw it clearly, the rage formenting below his dazed expression. The hatred in his eyes, melting and running down the rest of his face.
"Oh Davin..." D'Kera said. How could she not see it coming? How could she not know how this would end?
Is she so blind? he asks himself.
Quiet! I am your mother!
D'Keras voice, her real voice comes. She is here with him. Watching with him.
Then let's watch, he thinks and in his mind he grins spitefully.
Davin please-
"What you must think of me... Lower your shields, I'll have you beamed aboard and we can talk about it face to face. There's so much to say..." She thought he would, too. Back then, she had thought it would be so easy. He felt it. Her certainty.
"Commander, he's targ-"
"I said lower the shields, you insubordinate whelp, or I'll see you thrown out an airlock!" Davin hadn't gotten that part, not at the time, but it confirmed his suspicions. His fears. She had been like this, conniving, vicious, dangerous, even then.
"That's my son out there, and I have no intention of leaving him to the Elachi!"
Davin please-
It's not over! he growls through his pain.
"Lower your shields, Davin. Come aboard Okhala." He felt her smile, her hope, and beneath that he could feel her true motives. What she had wanted for him then wasn't much different from what was happening now. "You always wanted to see the inside of Mom's ship, didn't you?"
Davin PLEASE-
IT'S NOT OVER!
"...If this is what D'Kera Mandukar has become then I am not her son." And there it was. The first cut, the break in D'Keras confidence. And pain, too, genuine pain. More than Davin had expected. There was love for him there, among all the other twisted thoughts. She was doing this all, at least in her mind, out of some lingering shred of love.
DAVIN-
His mental grip begins to falter, thoughts slipping through the cracks.
"My mother died with Romulus, and I refuse to let you dishonor her memory... I am Davin T'Varros, and you will PAY for what you have done here!" Memory Davin, livid, practically foaming at the mouth, cut the connection. There was a moment in which nothing happened, and then the viewscreen showed the T'Varo move, spewing what torpedos it had in an angry green cloud.
D'Keras memory-voice was a startled whisper. "Raise-"
"-power to the inhibitors!" D'Keras real voice is screeching. Her face is green. Her eyes are wide and wild. Davin can feel himself smirking. Smirking through the pain. He doesn't think he can speak, but he doesn't need to. He said all he needed to eight years ago.
"Re-syncing neurolitic pattern," the Tal Shiar technician says, and everything begins to fade again. Not into memory, merely darkness.
D'Kera isn't smiling.